What's a Throuple?

Sarah Prager of O.School consults sex therapist and open relationship expert Indigo Stray Conger in her article on this poly buzzword.

Excerpts from the article:

Sex therapist Indigo Stray Conger, LMFT CST tells O.school that “just like a couple, a throuple might share meals together, live together, raise kids together, or not.” She continues: “Throuples vary widely in their structure and people’s motivation to be in them. Generally, members of a throuple believe you can love and commit deeply to more than one person.”

While this relationship structure doesn’t work for everyone, there are many advantages to having two partners instead of one. Conger says one nice part about being in throuple is that you can have partners with different interests for different sides of yourself: “I can watch hockey with one partner and play scrabble with the other and go to the movies with both.”

Conger also points out it’s a freeing way to express different sides of your sexuality or gender: “If I identify as pansexual and I am in a throuple with a cisgender male and a femme-presenting nonbinary partner, the sexual and gender expression available to me widens exponentially. I don't have to choose to sexually express myself the way I would with only one of those partners. Being in a committed relationship with two people widens the experience I have of my own sexuality, but within the context of a loving relationship instead of hook up culture.”

Conger says there can also be a doubling of emotional support. “If I'm feeling stressed and want to talk about it and one of my partners is on a deadline, they don't have to choose between work and being there for me,” says Conger. “They know I have another loving partner who can hold me and talk. Or, if I'm having a disagreement with one partner, the other partner who loves us both can be a voice of reason and support.”

To read the full article at O.School click here.